riverview; ic contact & friendr

[spellslots]

  ✉

CODE   🔋 12:01 AM

TAAKO

USERNAME
@fromTV

OCCUPTION
Pâtissier

MESSAGE
"You've got Taako. I'm too busy to take your call right now, leave a message."

TEXT

CALL

VIDEO

	Friendr
«		»
	» Age: old enough to know better » Seeking: 💲💲💲 » Preferences: none of your business » Interests: cash money » Bio: greatest chef in Faerûn, greatest transmutation wizard, follow me on insta @fromTV for the real shit
	base code by photosynthesis
	Taako
	« ✘ ✔ »

Comments

[spellslots]

[Taako contemplates pouring himself a drink, but decides he'd rather be sober.]

What happened, if you wanna get into it?

[dothelokimotion]

[ Loki snorts. ]

I hosted a small funeral for the newly departed of Asgard. With Sif and Thor.

[spellslots]

[Asgard is complicated, for Loki, so Taako can guess it must have been difficult for him to do.]

For Thor?

[As in: did he do it as a kindness for Thor?]

[dothelokimotion]

[ He hesitates, swirling the liquid. ]

For all of us.

It brought back bitter memories.

[spellslots]

That kinda thing usually does.

[Funerals, rites, even without adding the complicated feelings that Loki has towards Asgard.]

You know-- uh, you know you don't have to be okay, right?

[Loki has seemed lighter, since the canister, but Taako worries that part of it is just burying everything rather than dealing with it. It's what he'd do, after all.]

[dothelokimotion]

[ Loki doesn't answer, tilting the glass in his fingers. ]

It was petty. I am well aware that they are suffering. That we — we have lost a home.

[ And it is Loki's fault. It always, always is. Deliberate or indirect, it all comes back to him like some insidious poison he can't fully shake. ]

But all I could think was how lucky they still had me, Asgard's last and strongest sorcerer to help them perform the rites. When they couldn't have been bothered to tell me my mother died when I languished in my cell.

They need me and I want to throw it in their faces.

[spellslots]

So - fuck 'em.

[Taako says this easily, as if it's the most obvious thing in the world, but he has more than just that.]

You could throw it in their face if you wanted and it'd be pretty fucking fair. But would it make you feel any better?

[Would being petty help?]

Whatever you do, it might be kind to them but it doesn't have to be for them, you know? It can be for you.

[dothelokimotion]

[ Loki takes a deliberate sip because it prevents him from answering immediately, no, nothing makes me feel better, that's what got me in this mess to begin with, nothing could fill that hole. But at the very least, Loki is patching it up with unsteady fingers. ]

I'm not sure what would be good for me.

[spellslots]

Maybe that oughta be step one.

[It's a process in and of itself, but he thinks its where Loki needs to start.]

You've lived a fucking long time under Asgard's shadow and maybe you're like... free, or whatever you wanna call it, but it's still a change. You gotta figure out who you are without all that shit hanging over you.

[dothelokimotion]

[ Loki laughs, but it's choked and ugly. ]

It's a shadow that ensnared us all. I have to reconcile a father who told me he loved me and I deserved to die in equal measure. Everyone who decided who I should be is silenced.

And I — [ want to mourn, want to laugh, want a grave to spit on, want them to come back and give him some goddamn answers. ] — I hate that I mourn. They were all I ever knew and they ruined me.

[spellslots]

Hey. [It's quiet but firm, and even though Taako knows this is a situation he needs to treat carefully, he doesn't hesitate to move towards Loki, to take his face in his hands. This is important and he wants to make sure Loki is looking at him when he says it.] You are not ruined.

[dothelokimotion]

[ Gods do not cry easily. They are not easily moved. What they are is timeless, untouched. But Thor and Loki have long passed that threshold. They are inured in the futility of life and death, caught in the jaws of the trap, of caring. They weep and unashamed of those who see them as such. ]

[spellslots]

[Honestly, he isn't surprised by this turn of events, so he adapts quickly. Up on tip toes to wind his arms around Loki's shoulders and pull him into a loose hug, one hand steady at the nape of Loki's neck.]

I got you, bubbale.

[dothelokimotion]

[ Loki allows it, breathing heavily. His mind drifts to Odin and his last moments. Frigga would have been proud. How dare he. How dare anyone. After seeing Hela in his colours, in his image and he wonders how much of Odin saw in Loki and how much was Hela. ]

They're all gone and there are no more answers.

[spellslots]

I know.

[There's no solution for this, nothing that Taako can say to fix what's wrong, but he can keep his arms tight around Loki and smooth down his hair and hope that it helps, at least a little.]

You're gonna be okay, you've survived everything life's thrown at you so far.

[dothelokimotion]

[ He chuckles weakly. ]

I've died twice and neither time took. At this point, I'd be surprised if it ever did.

[spellslots]

Call me when you get to nineteen.

[It's a joke, rather than dismissive, because he knows it's different for them.]

[dothelokimotion]

I'll put in a reminder.

[spellslots]

[with a little laugh, Taako lets Loki out of the hug, though he does keep a hand on Loki's shoulder.]

Please don't die another seventeen times, I might have to actually admit I care.

[And that is clearly the worst.]

[dothelokimotion]

[ His good humour seems to be returning even if there's a faint shadow over his eyes. At least Loki seems no worse for wear. ]

I'll do my best to avoid it.

[spellslots]

Much appreciated.

[Taako gives Loki another once over, and despite his words, the concern is obvious in his expression.]

Feeling a little better with that outta your system?

[Crying is usually pretty cathartic.]

[dothelokimotion]

[ Loki shrugs. ]

It is difficult to say. I know in some way that I am far better off than Thor and Sif.

[spellslots]

Sometimes not loving things is easier.

[It reminds him of his conversation with Lucretia, about people, but the same can go for places.]

[dothelokimotion]

[ He wonders. Loki loved Asgard too. Everything he had done had been for Asgard long ago. ]

Or I merely spent enough time hating them to let it go.

[spellslots]

Kind of the same thing.

[More complicated, maybe, but still.]

You don't have to compare yourselves to them, yeah? It's different and it's like-- you're allowed to grieve differently.