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[ That is definitely appreciated - the only problem is that the only other things Kravitz can think of off the top of his head that might be interesting are... well, more downbeat than he'd like to be right now. There aren't that many high points in the day to day life of a reaper.

Well, there are more of them now, he supposes. Now that he no longer works strictly alone. But anecdotes about his sister and her de-facto husband aren't what Taako asked for. And really, when else is this situation going to arrange itself? When he can just say things, take it out of his own hands in a sense. It's almost fun. Gives the words 'this is a problem for future me' a whole new meaning. ]

You, ah. You left me a message once, on my stone - I was working, and you wanted to invite me over afterwards? I don't think you noticed, otherwise I think you would have done it much more since then, but um... you... you called me pretty bird at the end, just sort of out of nowhere. And I don't think I've ever rounded off a job quite so fast as I did when I listened back to that?

[ Gods, what can he do but laugh, if nothing else just about how ridiculous that is. He shakes his head at it, hiding his flushed face in one hand, eyes screwed shut against the entire idea of making eye-contact right now. ]

I did tell you there wasn't anything interesting...

[It's almost a shame that Kravitz has his eyes closed, it means he misses Taako's utterly delighted smile.]

Gonna argue you on that one cause it's definitely interesting. I mean, it's fucking adorable, holy shit.

[Now he really hopes that the real Kravtiz shows up here so that he can use this fact against him, though he has the sense not to say that out loud.

Instead, he gently curls his fingers around Kravtiz's wrist, to tug that hand away from hiding his handsome face.]

Lemme look at you, pretty bird.

[ Of course. Of course it is the very first thing out of his mouth. Kravitz isn't sure how he ever thought it might not be, in retrospect.

Still flushed dark pink, he nonetheless lets Taako move his hand from his face, and glances up to achieve eye contact for an impressive half a second before his eyes flit bashfully away. ]

I knew I shouldn't have told you that...

[Honestly that's even cuter. Taako might actually die from how cute it is.]

You absolutely shouldn't have but I'm glad ya did, cause now I've got some serious ammunition. I do have to say, didn't think something that simple would get to you, I mean - you know you're like crazy handsome right?

[Pretty is low on the scale of words that could be used to describe Kravtiz's looks.]

So you've said...

[ Not that he doesn't believe it or anything - he does have at least that level of basic awareness, and he does still very much pride himself on his general aesthetic. (There's a joke about preening in here, but if he's honest that really wouldn't be entirely a joke, so nevermind.) Still, just coming out and admitting to being aware of how attractive you are isn't a look everyone can pull off quite as easily as Taako can. ]

I have to ask, then - what would you think would do it?

You're putting me on the spot here, bubbale.

[Which is obviously a terrible crime and he buys himself a little moment to think by lightly tracing a finger along Kravtiz's jaw. There's something selfish in this, he thinks, the way he wants to remember everything about this moment when Kravitz won't be able to. He just wants something to hold onto.]

I guess I kinda thought it'd be something big, you know? Like, uh, the L-word.

[lesbians]

Edited 2018-02-25 06:34 (UTC)

Lesbians?

[ Great minds. It almost looks like a real question for a moment, but he laughs and shakes his head in the next. ]

No, I - that definitely is... something. I just thought maybe that would be too obvious.

[ And besides that, even his Taako doesn't just drop L-bombs willy nilly. Maybe that's part of how it has such an effect, because it's still not something that just happens as a matter of course. ]

[He rolls his eyes, but it's fond.]

I guess it is pretty obvious.

[The whole thing seems wild to Taako, despite knowing how Kravitz feels about him and knowing they've had time to settle into each other, he's just... he'd been closed off for so long, in Fearun.]

Does this mean it's my turn again?

[With the secrets, not that he sounds particularly fussed. The low stakes make it easier.]

[ A light shrug - he did say he wasn't particularly interesting in that sense. Or... most senses. ]

If you want it to be.

[ He makes a little 'the floor is yours' gesture. He's enjoying this game, after all. Not only for the obvious reasons of being generally curious, but - it's nice to think that Taako is getting things out that he might not otherwise. ]

[Honestly, he already knew what he was going to say here. Almost to make it fair, in a way, something sappy in return for Kravtiz giving up a sappy secret.]

It was totally worth dying eight fucking times to end up in your little black book.

[It's a roundabout way of saying what Taako really means; that it was worth dying to meet him.]

[ It doesn't make sense that a heart might swell when it hasn't done so much as beat in centuries - but Taako really has made something of a career of doing the impossible, hasn't he? Kravitz smiles, and it's that stupid smile of just being more smitten than it should be possible to be. ]

I'm glad you did.

[ He reaches up to touch Taako's face again, thumb brushing his jaw almost reverently - Kravitz isn't always as transparently sappy as this, but despite everything it's always there in the back of his mind that this is the last time. And knowing that, how else is he supposed to be?

Red eyes look up and he opens his mouth to speak, the words can I kiss you? so right there on the tip of his tongue as to be almost visible - but seems to think better of it and exhales, closing his mouth again. Afraid, maybe, of the answer. Easier just to stay like this and take what he's given. ]

[There's a brief temptation to be a bit of a little shit, to point out that it's kind of mean to be glad Taako died even if he just brought up the point himself, but he's thoroughly derailed by the way Kravtiz touches him and looks at him.

Taako isn't great at figuring out things like feelings, but he's fairly sure that he knows what it looks like when someone is thinking about kissing him.]

It's okay, darling.

[Something between reassurance and permission, whatever one Kravitz needs most.]

[ Is it?

Kravitz hesitates still, like he might not do it however much he'd like to, permission given or otherwise. There's a sort of apology in his eyes - sorry for this, for being here, for being late, for being wrong - and he closes them over it to tilt up his chin and press his lips gently to Taako's.

Maybe he's allowed a little selfishness, considering. So for now, for a minute, things can just... be okay. ]

[Taako hates how fucked up this entire situation has become. After spending a whole night thinking about what it meant that Kravitz was here and how to handle it, he'd come to something like an understanding with himself about how to move forward. Now that's pointless and it's not even the part he's most upset about.

The truly horrible part is how it must feel for Kravitz.

It's why Taako doesn't consider denying him something as easy to give as a kiss. He closes his eyes and meets Kravitz half way, uncertain what to do with his hands for a moment before he says an internal fuck it' and just skims a hand down Kravitz's chest to settle on his waist.]

[ It's easier like this, for all maybe it shouldn't be. It's easier than it should be to just pretend this isn't happening in the first place. To cast back in his mind to a time when the most difficult thing he had to come to terms with was accepting that someone as vibrant, as beloved by the world as Taako, would want to be anywhere near the Grim Reaper of all people. It's less of an effort not think about the fact that none of that happened to him at all, a thought that just keeps coming back up as if determined to crush this temporary peace to dust.

The telltale cloying smoke of panic starts to climb up his throat and Kravitz really doesn't mean to cling like he does, but there's really nowhere else for it to go. And this grounds him again, just like always. Just like listening to an idle story of something embarrassing Magnus once did, or being assured that surfing really isn't that hard, or watching Taako cook and being quietly glad that not having to eat doesn't mean he can't.

His thumb brushes Taako's jaw again, just to feel him there - and if Kravitz is a little less warm than he was before, that's probably understandable. ]

[Understanding exactly how Kravitz feels is an impossible feat, a fact that Taako is well aware of, but he knows the telltale signs of someone who's lost and desperate and clinging to the one thing in front of them. It's a little overwhelming, to be that for somebody, but he can deal with it.

Every time he has to break the kiss to breathe, Taako finds himself murmuring some useless platitude; it's alright, or I'm here, words that are inevitably kind of lie when he knows that it isn't going to be okay at all. He just needs to say something.

It's the same reason that after a brief moment of hesitation, Taako uses that hand on Kravitz's waist to push him onto his back, going with the momentum until he's on top of Kravitz, free arm braced on the bed so doesn't have to break the kiss. He just-- he just thinks it might help, the weight of him as a reassurance that he's here.]

[ As Kravitz rolls onto his back, he doesn't even have the presence of mind to think about how unexpected that is - just exhales heavily, as if he actually needed to. Though at this point it's probably fair to say that he did, even if it is for reasons entirely unrelated to respiration.

The little extra freedom of movement here is immediately tied up in keeping Taako close; one hand on his waist while fingers of the other curl loosely into the hair at the back of his neck.

He does try to be good about leaving those gaps for the one of them who does actually need air, especially when just the occasional murmur of Taako's voice is so comforting no matter what he's actually saying. It's during one of these gaps that Kravitz is the one who pauses, mouth still slightly open, chest heaving shallowly out of habit. ]

I love you...

[ The words are breathy and there's a pleading look on his face, but it's not to have the words returned - he knows better, and honestly the thought barely enters his mind. What he needs in this moment is just to be heard, to be understood, because being a temporary reflection doesn't mean that he feels any less than the original must. ]

[Maybe those words should be a surprise, not because Taako doesn't know that's how Kravitz feels but because he knows Kravitz was trying not to put too much pressure on him. But it's - different now, there's a desperation here that there wasn't yesterday and he thinks he understands what Kravitz wants here.

It breaks his heart a little, the pain of it written on his face as he looks down at Kravitz.]

I know, I know. I'm not gonna forget you.

[He can't make Kravitz real, that's beyond even his power, but he can at least promise this. That the memory if this will be important after Kravitz is gone.]

[ If only he could say the same.

It helps, though. And he believes it. And he hates himself a little for it too, because he already knows this isn't an easy memory, and maybe he should want Taako to forget instead. But at least... at least he won't have meant nothing.

The moment of desperate panic seems to ease off a little, and when he wraps both arms around Taako to hold him close again, it's with less of the sense of a drowning man clinging to a muddy bank. ]

Thank you.

[ For a long moment he's quiet, just re-orienting. Following the comfortingly regular rhythm of Taako's breathing, silently counting the beats of his heart. And then something comes to mind out of nowhere that draws a quiet chuckle. ]

It's funny, you know, I--

[ And apparently that's it. The sentence he was never going to make it to the end of. It's so sudden that it feels like it should make some kind of noise, but it doesn't - there's just what appears to be an entire person there one moment, and then as if a switch was flipped somewhere (which, who knows, maybe it was) - nothing at all. The only thing to say that there might ever have been anyone else there, a book left on the nightstand, still open to the last page he'd been reading. ]

[There's a brief, desperate moment where Taako thinks about reaching for a spell as if there's anything he could do to change this, before he gives it up. The bed is empty except for him but it still smells like Kravitz, something that shouldn't make sense when he was just made of light. Taako isn't going to question it too hard, maybe it's just his senses playing tricks on him and if they are, fine, it's better than nothing.

He should leave the room, it'd be better if he left the room, packed this moment away where it can't hurt him anymore.

It doesn't happen, his limbs are too heavy to move, all he can do is wrap his arms around the still warm pillow to give him something to hold onto while he cries.]

riverview; ic contact & friendr

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